So this past week I have been out of sorts, un-motivated, tired. I was also having some intestinal weirdness that was sort of like the monthly cycle but at really the wrong part of the month and sort of like I ate something that was off except I didn't... Some emotional stuff was going on also, I get really tired of the Friday evening that my husband likes to partake in, unless I go partake in it with him I am left to my own devices and it was starting to hurt my feelings even though I know I should just enjoy my alone time when I can get it. Then Saturday dawns with me feeling under the gun. I've got a transcription that needs doing and until it is done I am going to be a ball of stress about it. I also had a lesson on the docket and a gig at Borders. I was just about to sit down and start to work on the transcription when the doorbell rang and there was John's charge for the day, he had offered to watch his buddy's daughter and there she was. All of a sudden I was rethinking the transcription. How in the heck would I be able to hear and concentrate with 3 little girls doing their little girl thing? Not.
So I went to the bathroom and was attacked by a kidney stone. It was as if the universe said to me, ha ha you just think you have something to do today! Not! And really, they can last for more than a day or two, which is terrifying to envision from that moment of first attack.
I am becoming an old pro at ejecting things from myself at this point. Assume cow position and moo.
Meanwhile, John had acquired one of those crazy Oxycontin pills which I proceeded to take out of fear for the future, I am not sure if it did me any good or not, I think the stone had passed already but I got a nice nap out of it all. And than I got to be wackered out all day but really, I had a bunch of stuff to do! I noticed when the pill started to wear off, too and I am not at all surprised to learn that they are incredibly addictive. Yes, yes they are.
I had another small stone today and I took something else. Ibuprofen or something.
ugh
8.15.2009
8.06.2009
She used to be a vampire child
Poor Ella got bit by something horrid while we were camping and her forehead swelled up just like the buffy vampires. freaky.
8.03.2009
Camping
I think I have developed a small amount of hate for Wisconsin. There are too many bugs. Watching your child be swarmed by mosquitos is a horrifying experience. Besides the abortive hiking experience we had an adventure. Lots of playing at the park by the bathrooms. Abbey is getting the swing figured out and made it all the way across the monkey bars. She is growing into herself a little more, I like for her coordination to make a go at keeping up with her brain. When she is confident she can do anything, which is why I think she and school work so well together. Ella is generally content to let Abbey do it and then watch what happens. Can't say I blame her.
I do not like doritos, or potatoes cooked in pork juice. Or drunken husbands who yell and pick fights and then sleep all day while protesting that this is "relaxing". What it is, is it is selfish to have such demanding needs that require that someone else take on more that the usual amount of the load for an extended time during what is also supposed to be their time to relax.
I do not like doritos, or potatoes cooked in pork juice. Or drunken husbands who yell and pick fights and then sleep all day while protesting that this is "relaxing". What it is, is it is selfish to have such demanding needs that require that someone else take on more that the usual amount of the load for an extended time during what is also supposed to be their time to relax.
7.24.2009
Kiddie Land vs. Idiom Premier
from Phish.com - What if I am not camping, where do I park? If you are not camping you will need to park in Day Parking, ride one of the many private shuttles or be dropped off at the designated drop off area. If you are dropped off by your mom, make sure to give her a kiss goodbye. Seriously, moms are totally underappreciated.
And here is the part of the blog where I make it all about me for the bitching a moaning. Today is the day that my new band is having our first ever show. I am pre-occupied with it and quite nervous. Today is also the day that my in law people have chosen to take the kiddos to Kiddie Land. I have tried to no avail to point out that I am busy on Friday afternoons in general. That may be the time that the 9 to 5ers like to play hookey from their drudgery but for me it is not. And today in particular is the day of my first show in how long? I really wish I could practice and meditate all day but no. And I am not feeling patient and loving which is required if one takes their spawn to the crazy making amusement park.
But I will go and it will be fun and I'm making it the most not fun by being a stinker about my needs and how they are never taken into consideration when these things are planned. Friday's are bad, if you must go on Friday then the morning is best so when is it? Friday afternoon! Yay!
And then later hopefully cross your fingers I do not make a mockery of myself trying to play fast and loud in front of people who may have paid money to see me.
Oh yes, and did I mention that the last time these said in laws came to see me play the drunk guy got in a yelling fight with a mom whose small child was taking too long to use the facility? Needless to say I will never feel like inviting them to anything ever again. How embarassing.
7.17.2009
Cheesecake!
The gig yesterday was at the Eli's factory. I was unprepared for the elements, I am spoiled by having things provided and I need to bring my own. I need to get one of those plexiglass dealies. Actually, I think the universe i telling me I need to just know these tunes and not need the music anymore. These tunes are in there, everybody has them in there it's just a matter of getting them out on command. I can feel the knowledge starting to creep around the sides of my ears. I feel a step slow, though, and it's all fitness. yoga and practicing are lacking day to day, and in not doing those important things I am also not doing so many less important things. Why is that so hard to remember? Or enforce, rather. Payment for this gig, was abysmal. We got a free lunch and a cheesecake, but the vegetarian option was a side of hummus with super greasy grilled pitas. It was hardly fit for consumption. The cheesecake was alright I guess, but I don't need shit like that in my house so I gave it to Mimi. All in all I cannot recommend the Eli's factory for fun on a Thursday afternoon unless you get to bring your bass and play some music.
6.30.2009
Practicing
Is of course as always front center of my agenda. Shaping the flow of it and trying to control it are my favorite frustrations.
Must plan Ella's birthday stuff! Must make invitations this morning and pass them out this week.
off to do eeet
Must plan Ella's birthday stuff! Must make invitations this morning and pass them out this week.
off to do eeet
6.25.2009
Adventures with Phish or how love can save the world
So my intentions for this weekend with Phish were to try and be as open to the experience as possible and to keep the love channel tuned in at all times.
First revelation #1, it came out in a "discussion" while we were getting our gear ready and packed that my partner in this world does not think that I focus enough "effort" towards the housecleaning aspects of our life. Aha! So that was really nice to be able to put that one into the process bin and out of the utter confusion bin.
So, off we go. "Camping" would seem to be no longer available in any semblance of the word around Deer Creek. We got reamed for 50 dollars to camp at dead creek where our reservation was only as good as the amount of space we needed to park our car and pitch our little 2 man tent. Fortunately we are smiley and got just about the last space that wasn't actually IN the road, meanwhile there were how many sites that had arrived early and had so much space, but whatever.
This year we had no spring whatsoever. It ceased to be cold all the time but rained and rained and rained and rained and was chilly. Then it was 90. And humid. So we chose to ride the shuttle rather than walk the mile or whatever in the hot because the shuttle was air conditioned! Liars! So hot in there, we cooked. But finally to the lot.
During the months and weeks leading up to these shows they seemed surreal and un-imaginable. We sat down by the pond, under the tree, where we have sat so many times before but it was different. Not bad, not at all, just older and wiser and more ready than ever. We wandered the lots and waited for Kara and Thom and then they were there! And then we were in and then we were sitting on the lawn right in front of the screen waiting. Still waiting. And then there was Phish! And then they were playing and then I had to take a moment. And then it was better than ever and I was able to hook in to that hose they were using. I thought the music was amazingly well played and truly spot on as cliche as that sounds. I have not listened back yet but I am definitely going to have to check out Trey's jam in the melt again because, um, melty! And I also want to transcribe everything about that Lawnboy and take it to Border's.
Meanwhile, back on earth there was a massive lightening storm brewing on the horizon. During setbreak I asked a yellow shirt if we were safe on the lawn and they were completely honest and said "No. You guys are going to be asked to go to your cars and wait the storm out." Thankfully Kara and Thom had their truck with the futon in the back so we all piled in. Else we had no car and would have had to endure the lightening storm out doors. Have I ever mentioned how much I love my friend Kara? She is such a little gem, I feel terribly lucky to follow her around.
Then the storm was over and we went back in for the second set. Missed a little bit of the opener but it seemed like they were waiting on us. The crowd control was absolutely non existent. It was just like the Dead show at the horizon last month, it was like, the president of the US is a fan and told them to be nice or something. I was thinking then, before the makisupa Alpine experience. But really, we just walked right in after the rain delay no muss no fuss no stub no nothing. And it didn't really seem extra crowded or anything, we pretty much got our fancy spot back by the screen and everything. I think, or maybe we didn't but we were close.
After the show the rains came and we trudged around in the mud until we came to our campsite where we had left the car windows cracked and the tent tied open. Fortunately nothing was really that wet?! It was Miracle #1 or maybe #2.
Up bright and early so as not to be run over and killed and also to get the hell out of dodge and back up the road. Went to the most crowded starbucks ever but fortunately with north indy worker bees rather than hippies so I could really use the washroom to it's fullest and I left it how I found it thank you very much. Then we drove home and had a real shower and drove on up to Wisconsin where I had the best Subway ever. Got to our campsite and set up camp, up stroll 2 girls who want to share our space because the place is sold out. We have lots of space so sure.
head to the show, find the scooters, proceed to the most annoying spot and get stuck there for the entire show, make elaborate plans inside mind for making tomorrow better, lose vision for part of the evening work work workin hard to have a good time but succeeding. John was set on repeat with that dylan tune, walkin down the line, I'm walkin down the line, I'm walking down the line, my feet'll be flyin to tell about my troubled mind.
Day 3 last day. We get up and our camp mates turn out to be nice folks, the one girl did a yoga class for those of us who wanted to which was really just what the dr. ordered. Then she proceeded to set up her massage chair and do that for everybody, then her buddy gave me 2 necklaces for the girls which I had also intended to get in the lots but there was NO VENDING AT ALPINE.
So we head to the show. Today there is to be no messing around I wanna be in front. We head to the front of the lawn and stake out our little space and it was an amazing evening. Our space was magical.
Several more miracles later and we made it home in one piece. Clocks are completely reset.
woohoo
First revelation #1, it came out in a "discussion" while we were getting our gear ready and packed that my partner in this world does not think that I focus enough "effort" towards the housecleaning aspects of our life. Aha! So that was really nice to be able to put that one into the process bin and out of the utter confusion bin.
So, off we go. "Camping" would seem to be no longer available in any semblance of the word around Deer Creek. We got reamed for 50 dollars to camp at dead creek where our reservation was only as good as the amount of space we needed to park our car and pitch our little 2 man tent. Fortunately we are smiley and got just about the last space that wasn't actually IN the road, meanwhile there were how many sites that had arrived early and had so much space, but whatever.
This year we had no spring whatsoever. It ceased to be cold all the time but rained and rained and rained and rained and was chilly. Then it was 90. And humid. So we chose to ride the shuttle rather than walk the mile or whatever in the hot because the shuttle was air conditioned! Liars! So hot in there, we cooked. But finally to the lot.
During the months and weeks leading up to these shows they seemed surreal and un-imaginable. We sat down by the pond, under the tree, where we have sat so many times before but it was different. Not bad, not at all, just older and wiser and more ready than ever. We wandered the lots and waited for Kara and Thom and then they were there! And then we were in and then we were sitting on the lawn right in front of the screen waiting. Still waiting. And then there was Phish! And then they were playing and then I had to take a moment. And then it was better than ever and I was able to hook in to that hose they were using. I thought the music was amazingly well played and truly spot on as cliche as that sounds. I have not listened back yet but I am definitely going to have to check out Trey's jam in the melt again because, um, melty! And I also want to transcribe everything about that Lawnboy and take it to Border's.
Meanwhile, back on earth there was a massive lightening storm brewing on the horizon. During setbreak I asked a yellow shirt if we were safe on the lawn and they were completely honest and said "No. You guys are going to be asked to go to your cars and wait the storm out." Thankfully Kara and Thom had their truck with the futon in the back so we all piled in. Else we had no car and would have had to endure the lightening storm out doors. Have I ever mentioned how much I love my friend Kara? She is such a little gem, I feel terribly lucky to follow her around.
Then the storm was over and we went back in for the second set. Missed a little bit of the opener but it seemed like they were waiting on us. The crowd control was absolutely non existent. It was just like the Dead show at the horizon last month, it was like, the president of the US is a fan and told them to be nice or something. I was thinking then, before the makisupa Alpine experience. But really, we just walked right in after the rain delay no muss no fuss no stub no nothing. And it didn't really seem extra crowded or anything, we pretty much got our fancy spot back by the screen and everything. I think, or maybe we didn't but we were close.
After the show the rains came and we trudged around in the mud until we came to our campsite where we had left the car windows cracked and the tent tied open. Fortunately nothing was really that wet?! It was Miracle #1 or maybe #2.
Up bright and early so as not to be run over and killed and also to get the hell out of dodge and back up the road. Went to the most crowded starbucks ever but fortunately with north indy worker bees rather than hippies so I could really use the washroom to it's fullest and I left it how I found it thank you very much. Then we drove home and had a real shower and drove on up to Wisconsin where I had the best Subway ever. Got to our campsite and set up camp, up stroll 2 girls who want to share our space because the place is sold out. We have lots of space so sure.
head to the show, find the scooters, proceed to the most annoying spot and get stuck there for the entire show, make elaborate plans inside mind for making tomorrow better, lose vision for part of the evening work work workin hard to have a good time but succeeding. John was set on repeat with that dylan tune, walkin down the line, I'm walkin down the line, I'm walking down the line, my feet'll be flyin to tell about my troubled mind.
Day 3 last day. We get up and our camp mates turn out to be nice folks, the one girl did a yoga class for those of us who wanted to which was really just what the dr. ordered. Then she proceeded to set up her massage chair and do that for everybody, then her buddy gave me 2 necklaces for the girls which I had also intended to get in the lots but there was NO VENDING AT ALPINE.
So we head to the show. Today there is to be no messing around I wanna be in front. We head to the front of the lawn and stake out our little space and it was an amazing evening. Our space was magical.
Several more miracles later and we made it home in one piece. Clocks are completely reset.
woohoo
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